She is the one I prayed for. Several times a day, I prayed for a baby girl. Either through my womb or through adoption, I would love her to pieces either way. With so many miscarriages in my past, I knew the chances of me carrying a baby to term were slim, very slim, but I held onto faith knowing that God would give me a daughter the way He saw fit.
Her face came to me in a dream one night. She was the most perfect shade of chocolate with a head full of curly dark brown hair. Her cheeks were plump and perfect, and her eyes were bright like the sunshine. She smiled at me and it was then, during that dream that I knew God had heard my prayers. My baby girl was on the way!
Before I go on, let me say this…
I have 4 boys, currently ages 17, 14 (twins), and 3 years old. I love them to the moon and back 1,000,000 times. Even with the love that I have for them and the bonds that we share, there is nothing like the relationship between mother and daughter. I longed for her and the bond that I knew only we could share.
It was about 8pm on the 2nd to last Monday in Ramadan 2013. I had just finished preparing our Iftar (after fast meal) when my husband’s phone rang. He answered the phone and soon after walked into our bedroom. It was the call that answered my prayers. The birth mother of our baby girl was in labor and had been admitted to the hospital! It was clear right in that moment, that adoption would again be the chosen path for me to experience mothering a daughter.
She was born that night around 10:30pm. I spoke to her birth mother on the phone to ensure that all was ok. I didn’t sleep that night, I smiled all night long giddy with joy over the birth of my precious girl. When we arrived at the hospital on Tuesday, I saw her for the 1st time. She was perfect! Bundled up so perfectly and sleeping so peacefully.
It took three days. Three days to get all the paperwork together for us to bring her home. That Friday, my husband and I arrived at the hospital and brought our baby girl home. My husband took only one photo of me holding her in the hospital. She was taking a bottle, as the hospital wasn’t baby friendly and wouldn’t allow an adoptive mother to breastfeed.
It was no problem at all though, because I knew that was one battle I didn’t want right then. When we arrived home with baby girl, she took the breast right away with no issues and nursed for a total of 22 months. 1st with the use of a supplemental feeder, then after 6 months or so I was producing enough milk that we tossed the feeder and went for what we knew!
All of my adoptive experiences, bringing home our baby girl was the best. It was truly special. My daughter looks like me, has my mannerisms, has a similar hair texture and color, and gives me a run for my money every chance she gets. She is exactly the child I dreamt of!
I have shared this story many times in hopes that other families of color will consider adoption. It is such an amazing experience, one that will change your life and the lives of your adopted children forever. Given the high rates of Black and Brown children awaiting adoption, there is definitely no shortage of children for you to welcome into your heart and home.
Of course there are 1,000 reasons why you may think adoption isn’t for you, but there are 10,000 more reasons why you should do it. You don’t have to be wealthy, or an ivy league grad, or a business owner. You don’t have to own your own home, or drive a fancy car. You just have to be you. The person reading this blog post who is full of love and good intention.
I’m eager to hear your adoption stories!